


Medic’s Late Night Thoughts

by FuryFire



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Blood, Consent, F/M, Fluff, Masochism, Masturbation, Mentions of Sex, Other, Pining, Sadism, Smut, Violence, maybe more later - Freeform, mentions of sexuality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-17
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:28:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24764659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FuryFire/pseuds/FuryFire
Summary: Medic thinks a lot. He thinks about you a lot too. And violence. And sex.
Relationships: Medic/Reader
Comments: 3
Kudos: 71





	1. Spesh

**Author's Note:**

> Whooooo boy. This will be fun. If you have requests, please let me know. But some stuff will be based off of what I would like to see.
> 
> I’m non-binary so some chapters will be neutral but some aren’t, and most chapters will be quite short.

There was an emptiness in the infirmary. It wasn’t the normal kind, it was the lonely kind. Medic had not felt quite so lonely in such a long time, and yet at this moment, he did. There was a dark feeling churning in his gut, and yet deep down he understood where Heavy was coming from, even if it hurt. 

Medic turned to his glass that sat on his desk. It was filled with a deep amber liquid. It was his least favorite in stock, but he figured he deserved no better than what he had at hand. 

His grimace won out, and he scowled down at the glass. How cowardly was he, to hide in her when he should truly be apologizing? How cowardly a man he was. 

It was truly his pride that had gotten too him. Far too prideful for a man who could not form an apology with words. Far too prideful for a man who was disgusted with himself. 

During that fight, something had wound itself in his gut, and part of him had wished she would just kill him there. He was not ready for these feelings churning in his gut, nor the hot fire that bound itself to his thighs. His chest ached at the thoughts once more burning through him, and he sighed heavily.

He could not really understand what had started all of this, but he knew deep down that it was her spirit, and her glorious body when in battle. She was a force unlike all others, and he loved it. Watching her mow down men like it was nothing, and her insatiable need to stab someone with her knife, it was a beautiful piece of work truly, was truly something else. Perhaps that was all it was, a need for her beautiful hands wrapped around his throat, or for her to be coated in the blood of their enemies. 

No, he thought so himself quite seriously, it is not quite just that.

Medic sighed again. Perhaps he would never understand this need, but he could understand her need for him to apologize.

He shook his head. No, it would be different soon. Perhaps she would learn to trust him again on the battlefield. There he could prove to her that her safety was indeed a foremost thought upon his mind, and her need for battle a close second. There he could prove that he knew what he was doing. 

He frowned. That might not be the best way. She is not quite like his other comrades. She is something different, and with Heavy at her side, it would be difficult to just slide back into her life as it is. 

A growl tore itself from his throat before he downed the rest of his drink.

He really should stop being so prideful. 

  
  



	2. Violence

He wanted to touch her. He knew that much. It was the way she moved on the battlefield, her strong body twisting around her foes, and slicing them up with her knife that shimmered just so. It was the blood that got to him most, the way she was often covered, her face glistening with the remains of her enemies. It got to him in a way little else could. 

The way he wanted to touch her was far beyond what a teammate should’ve thinking about. It was not friendly and kind,the way he wanted to ravage her. It was not angry or hateful either, rather a strong and passionate session he often dreamt about. Of course, he would never take her without an excited, ‘yes’, but he thought about her anyways. He knew there was a slim chance of her wanting him back. She was beautiful and graceful and kind, and he was... not. He was angry, and large and had a bad habit of glaring at everyone when he had no reason to. He could think of a thousand reasons as to why he did not deserve her, so he thought about her in silence. 

Medic sighed and let himself sink into his bed. He was tired, and thinking about her more would not help him at all. 

He thought of hate and the war instead. When he wasn’t feeling well,this is where his thoughts always turned. He used to be hated in Germany, hated in America before the next war started. He had been hated wherever he went, all because of a war that had been fought by other people, for awful reasons. He had little to do with it, focusing instead on his career, and trying to help the starving and sick that he found. He was a sick man, but he was not evil, that he could say in his defense.There was a time in his life where he was naive and thought he could help everyone. 

Medic let his face fall into his hands. Not tonight, he thought to himself. He would not let himself dwell where things fell. He would remain calm. 

He thought of you again. You were always so calm in the face of adversity, took his own arguments with you so well. You were good at calming others down too, and he wondered to himself if you would help him now. 

No, he thought again. You would not help such a violent man with your kind words. 


End file.
